At church, some of the normal rules of conversation are suspended. My mom always taught me to never talk about religion, politics, or money. But at church, it's pretty impossible not to talk about religion. And politics that have to do with respecting all people (Gen 1:27, Gal 3:28) or serving the oppressed or poor (insert 1,000,000 scripture references of support here), are also always up for discussion. But even if religion and politics are up for grabs at church, the last topic -- money -- seems to be even more taboo in the church than the outside world. But ironically, Jesus talked about money more than anything else, but he was quite an edgy guy! As we learned in church the other week, when people see a dollar bill, they often think of words like "dirty," "greed," and "materialism." There are many churches in this country that pastors aren't even allowed to hold the offering plate, because the image of a pastor touching money seems to sully their moral presence!
Personally, money makes me highly anxious. I get this from my mother, who got it from her father, who lived through the depression. I'm a saver, because I worry too much about tomorrow. I deny myself new clothes, haircuts, and other luxuries most women indulge in because I feel guilt that I don't contribute enough financially to our family to deserve it. In times of high stress, I channel all my anxiety towards our finances, obsessing over our budgets and fretting over pennies. I'm a notorious deal-hunter, and for a while I even got into coupons. And then there's the whole big issue of debt in our household; while I'm so money conscious that I've only let us carry a balance on our credit card a couple of times, our student loan debt payments are significantly larger than our mortgage! (Thanks Wash U and Harvard!) I so despise this burdensome yoke of student debt that I've become militant about quoting scripture to myself that warns against taking loans or taking on debt, and touting to Robby the wisdom of the Amish and the Duggars on TLC who live debt free! (Check out, for example, Deuteronomy 15:6, 28:12, Proverbs 22:7, 22:26-27, and Romans 13:18.)
All these factors coupled with my innate anxiousness can make me pretty a frantic lady, anxiously clinging onto every penny and hoarding all my worldly goods up into barns, as the Bible says (Matthew 6:19). But you know what my cure is -- what the only cure is? Giving. Every week, when the offering plate comes around, we all have to literally pry the money off of ourselves because our we've grown so attached to it. It's hard work, but it is also heart work. A buddhist monk once told me that each dollar or possession that belongs to us has an invisible string -- like fishing line -- that fetters our hearts down to the ground and prevents our spirits from soaring free. By giving, we snap those fetters. So the offering in church is a spiritual discipline we must do together before God and others every single week, not just during stewardship season, to break these bonds as a people. And for it to be a true spiritual discipline, something that literally builds us up in Spirit, we can't just, as Paul Nickerson says, tip the church. We must practice planned and proportional giving. We must give until the number we decide upon makes us uncomfortable; we must, as the prophet Mother Teresa commanded us, give until it hurts! That's how we know that we're growing in our discipleship and our walk with Christ.
But how can you be absolutely sure that you're growing, that you're not just a spiritual tipper -- someone who saves her first fruits for herself and throws the scraps and leftovers to God's Church and people? Let's throw away the 10% test and ask a few more spiritual questions:
1) Do I spend more on brunch after church on Sundays than I put in the offering plate?
2) Do I budget for clothes but not for Christ's Church?
3) Do I feel just fine and cozy about the amount I'm giving, but wouldn't feel fine and cozy if that same amount were made public?
4) Do I feel like God or my church "owes me" for something?
5) Does a voice in my head encourage me to not give or give less than I could, saying things like, "I'll give once I'm out of debt," or "I give my time instead of my money," or "I'll donate my old (insert item here) as my offering," or "I'm just starting out; I'm too young to give," or "I'm retired; I paid my dues," or "I've got kids to take care of," or "I only give 1% of my income because I make 400,000 a year, and that's a whopping $4,000 -- more than my share!" etc. etc. etc.
Well let me tell you something my brothers and sisters: everyone has a reason not to give, or to give less than they can or should. Now y'all know that I don't believe in a literal devil with a forked tail or anything like that, but I do believe that there's a seed of sin and evil inside each of us, whispering to us to not trust God to provide for us, calling to our hearts through a never ending wish list rather than through the faces of those in need, encouraging us to turn inwards on ourselves rather than to open our hands up and give.
But when I give, I forcefully break the bonds -- those tiny tethers of fishing line -- that money, debt, and possessions hold down on my heart. I banish anxiety and practice trust in God by affirming that God will provide for my needs. My heart grows glad through generosity. I experience good feelings about my money, instead of my habitual anxiety. I feel connected to God's Church and invested in its future. Unlike most places my money goes, I feel assured that when my money goes to God's Church, I know it's going to a good place, a place that blesses me and my community and equips the saints to go out into the world and do good. I feel like my little life has more meaning because I give back. And that little voice that was whispering to me that I neeeeeeeeeeed this or that, has been hushed for the moment. It's hard work to give, I admit, but it's heart work; it changes my heart for the better.
Jesus said, "Where your treasure is, you're heart will be also." So I ask you now, what does your budget, credit card statement, and bank accounts say about where your heart is?
Think about it. Pray about it. And check out this website for scripture quotes about money to start discerning how much God is calling you to pledge to Christ's Church this year. And check out some of the UCC's resources on stewardship. Last but not least, don't forget to make your pledge next Sunday!
